Ujie said I could work under pressure. I sometimes think that I produce my best works under pressure. Sometimes however, I crack. Case in point: yesterday I was quite busy trying to finish ujie’s taking off, while juggling the preparation of Miss Tang’s addendum, when suddenly Miss Tang asked me a question about a contractor’s claim that I had prepared the day before. She only told me to write what we paid next to their claim amount per block. Sekali aku check-check, tak dapat. It’s a simple enough exercise, one I should be able to do with an eye closed. Check lagi, tak tally. Check satu-satu pun tak dapat.
I began to panic. Then I took some time off and went to dinner with my colleagues. At that time, Zufri called and said that he’s tapauing KFC and would I like some? I said no, I’m having dinner now. Then I saw our car, heading towards KFC. I looked around me and said to myself, what the hell am I doing? I had a kind of longing feeling. I don’t know. It’s a feeling I can’t describe lah. Mostly I felt guilty.
When I began to ponder upon the stupid thing I was working on, dan masih tak dapat-dapat lagi penyelesaiannya, I began to cry. Not an all out sob-fest, lebih kepada air mata berlinangan. I packed up and left. On the walk home, linangan air mata itu berterusan.
When I reached home and was greeted by Emma, segala keresahan dan linangan air mata itu hilang. Diganti dengan rasa.. lega? Gembira? Entah, again it is a feeling I can’t describe. Serius ni, bukannya aku cuba menjadi corny or cliché or poyo ke, tapi bila nampak Emma, rasa penat jerih bekerja itu hilang. Nak nangis di bahu Zufri pun tak jadik.
Maybe I felt at peace.
This morning, the problem sorted itself out.
Maybe I was just too tired to be able to think straight.
Al-Fatihah buat arwah Din Beramboi. He’s the only reason I can sit through Afi dan Abah.
I began to panic. Then I took some time off and went to dinner with my colleagues. At that time, Zufri called and said that he’s tapauing KFC and would I like some? I said no, I’m having dinner now. Then I saw our car, heading towards KFC. I looked around me and said to myself, what the hell am I doing? I had a kind of longing feeling. I don’t know. It’s a feeling I can’t describe lah. Mostly I felt guilty.
When I began to ponder upon the stupid thing I was working on, dan masih tak dapat-dapat lagi penyelesaiannya, I began to cry. Not an all out sob-fest, lebih kepada air mata berlinangan. I packed up and left. On the walk home, linangan air mata itu berterusan.
When I reached home and was greeted by Emma, segala keresahan dan linangan air mata itu hilang. Diganti dengan rasa.. lega? Gembira? Entah, again it is a feeling I can’t describe. Serius ni, bukannya aku cuba menjadi corny or cliché or poyo ke, tapi bila nampak Emma, rasa penat jerih bekerja itu hilang. Nak nangis di bahu Zufri pun tak jadik.
Maybe I felt at peace.
This morning, the problem sorted itself out.
Maybe I was just too tired to be able to think straight.
Al-Fatihah buat arwah Din Beramboi. He’s the only reason I can sit through Afi dan Abah.
1 comment:
oh maafkan aku Intan, aku baru mambaca entry kau ini, aku tak boleh buka melalui bb aku, hohohoho rupanya kesian pada kau...macam mana la aku dah pindah nanti, mesti kita berdua tertekan tiada tempat bergosip selain suami dan anak kita...pasal balik jumpa anak rasa lega - aku rasa itulah kelebihan Allah bagi kat kita....syukurlah....
Post a Comment